


You are a hero

by Aragorn_II_Elessar



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Cordelia Chase, Canonical Character Death, Crisis on Infinite Earths Crossover Event (CW DC TV Universe), Flashbacks, Gen, Not Canon Compliant, Not completely at least, Not for Lauriver fans, Oliver Queen Has PTSD, Oliver Queen Needs a Hug, Past Character Death, Post-Season/Series Finale, Spectre Oliver Queen, Spiritual, not for Olicity fans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:07:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27976335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aragorn_II_Elessar/pseuds/Aragorn_II_Elessar
Summary: After his first death in the Crisis of Infinite Earths, Oliver Queen is taken on a spiritual journey through his past by two women, who show him the kind of person he truly is.
Comments: 30
Kudos: 14





	1. The guides

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Buffyverse, Arrowverse or anything else you may recognize
> 
> So I got this idea from Stand with Ward and Queen, and he said he intended to do something like that, but since he hasn't, I decided to do something like that myself, inspired by Smallville 10x4, Stand's 'Barry Allen's Day of Reckoning' and a Superman tribute titled 'Superman: A Symbol of Hope' which is the best Superman tribute ever.
> 
> Also, the pairing I support here will be Oliver/Sara, and I won't be too friendly to Olicity or even Lauriver for good reasons, most of which involve their toxic fanatics (especially in Lauriver's case). And if you buy into the Oliver bashing the writers love doing, this is not for you either. So if you fall into either of these camps, click the back button immediately.
> 
> So anyway, thank you very much to Stand with Ward and Queen for giving me permission to do this, and I hope all enjoy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oliver is approached by two women after his first death to help him out.

Oliver turned to look as Jim Corrigan after Slade, Mia and John Constantine had been sent away by him and asked. "What now?"

"For now, I shall leave you", Corrigan said, walking off.

"What?" Oliver asked in surprise. "But what about what you wanted of me?"

"I shall give you the power, but before that, you must learn exactly the kind of person you are", Corrigan said. "And I am not the right person to explain that to you."

"Then who is?" Oliver asked but Corrigan was already gone, nowhere to be seen anywhere around there.

"Oh, great!" Oliver groaned to himself sarcastically.

"I am."

Oliver turned on hearing the soft-spoken female voice, and saw a beautiful woman. She wasn't too tall, about 5 feet and 4 inches, her hair were long, blonde and flowing, and she wore a blue shirt and black trousers.

But what truly got Oliver were her eyes. There was sadness behind them, but also kindness and understanding, and it looked like she could see the depth of a person just by looking at them.

"I am Oliver Queen", Oliver introduced himself.

"I know who you are, since I and one other are to guide you", the woman told him. "My name is Tara Maclay."

"So, you are what?" Oliver asked her. "Some ancient being or something?"

Tara chuckled, and it actually sounded melodious to Oliver's ears. There was just something about her.

"No, I was once a human, but one who knew magic, so I was a witch", Tara said, before rubbing her chest. "Then I died."

She winced as she said that, and from her action of rubbing her chest, Oliver could tell she had been murdered by being shot there or stabbed. But who would kill such a woman? This was the first time he had met her, and he could already tell she was a very good and kind-hearted person.

"But I was given a job by the higher powers, to be a guide", Tara said. "To souls who needed it. And seeing as what you are about to become, you need it the most, Oliver Queen."

"Why exactly do I need guidance?" Oliver asked.

"That I alone shall not explain to you", Tara said before she grasped his hands and closing her eyes, chanted something.

A bright flash of light surrounded them both and they were in a white place that looked like-

"Heaven?" Oliver asked. "Is this Heaven?"

"Nah, but it does look like it."

Oliver and Tara turned to see a beautiful woman with long, black hair, and she wore a long white dress, which enhanced her beauty. She was slightly taller than Tara.

Oliver tried to assess her. Based on her tone, she was probably a sarcastic person who liked to quip, but based on how she was looking at him, he could tell she was a good and kind person too, just not one who showed it in a straightforward way was all.

"In case you're gonna ask, which you are, since you and I are going to have a talk and we can't have that till you know my name, I am Cordelia Chase", the woman introduced herself with a smile before turning to Tara. "Thanks for bringing this guy here. I mean, with how much he hates himself, he is really going to need this."

"I hate myself?" Oliver asked. "So the point is?"

"The point is you shouldn't, because you did little wrong, and others exaggerated it", Cordelia told him as she got up from where she was sitting. "And all of those exaggerations, you just decided to buy 'em after a certain point, which had a bad effect on you."

"We are going to show you that you are not as bad as others say, or you think", Tara said, and then she and Cordelia held one hand of his each, and then suddenly, Oliver found himself looking at himself, with Sara, in the Queen's Gambit before it had gone down.

"1, 2, 3. It's getting closer", Sara said.

"That's not very scientific", Oliver told her.

"What would you know about science, Mr. Ivy League dropout?" Sara asked as Oliver sat next to her.

"I happen to know a lot about science. I know about fermentation. I know biology", he kissed her.

"Laurel's gonna kill me. Oh, she's so gonna kill me", Sara said.

"Your sister will never know. Come here", he threw her on the bed.

"Ha Ha ha!" Sara laughed.

There was thunder as she said. "Ok, that one was really close."

"Sarah, we're gonna be fine", he kissed her.

The champagne glasses tilted and suddenly the cabin flipped and they were thrown to opposite sides of the room. Sara screamed.

Oliver regained his balance and looked up to find Sara only to see her ripped away by the ocean.

"Sara?" The water took her away and she screamed.

"Sara!" The two Olivers screamed together. While Oliver knew she had survived, seeing this was painful, and it was pretty much one of the worst memories of his life.

"So you cheated on Laurel with her sister, Sara", Cordelia said bluntly. "And so you think the Lance family's life going to hell is your fault."

"So, you're trying to tell me it isn't?" Oliver asked.

"A small part of the blame does lie on you", Tara said. "But you did not force or blackmail Sara to come with you to the Gambit, she did that of her own accord, so what happened to her is on her."

"And not that much on you", Cordelia said before putting her finger on his heart. "Plus, it was not a fling."

"Huh?" Oliver asked.

"You may not have realized it back then, but you loved Sara just as much as you loved Laurel", Tara said. "And if anything, you two understood each other better than you and Laurel ever did."

"What are you trying to say?" Oliver asked.

"The cheating thing, horrible, but here's an explanation, remember, explanation, not justification", Cordelia said. "The man you became, you always had the potential to be that man. Both Laurel and Sara saw that potential. However, Laurel wanted to mold your potential in a way so that you could be what she wanted you to be, and that is why, with her, you felt congested, and freaked out, with which you coped in an unhealthy way, by cheating. Sara, on the other hand, wanted you to reach your full potential in a natural way, and be the man you could be on reaching it. That's why you two understand each other the best, or did at least."

"So what happened to Sara wasn't my fault, at least not completely", Oliver sighed as he looked at them both. "I did love Sara, I did. I knew it since the island. She and I had even promised that we would try out a relationship and see where it goes if we got off the island."

"And Laurel, while rightfully angry with the two of you, went too far in her condemnation", Tara said, showing sympathy for both sides. "Saying you deserved to rot in Hell for a lot longer than five years was unjustified, and so was throwing a glass at Sara, which could have hurt her as she not left at that moment. So her anger was justified, but being angry at you two for mistakes you made years ago and have grown from, wasn't."

Tara remembered Willow's descent and ascent. "We all make mistakes, but the way we grow from them is what defines us. You and Sara grew tremendously from your mistakes, and became better people, who unfortunately, got unfairly judged for stupid mistakes of your youth."

Oliver looked down, deep in thought. Cordelia and Tara weren't wrong. What he and Sara had done to Laurel was horrible, but Oliver had always felt drawn to Sara, and now he knew it was because of the reasons these two had stated. They understood each other, and could be themselves around each other.

Didn't justify the cheating though, it was still horrible, but yeah, Laurel and the rest kept blaming and judging them both for mistakes of their youth even after they had changed into better people, and Laurel had used that to justify her addiction and anger.

So while he and Sara had been wrong to do what they did, Laurel had also been wrong to judge them for that after such a long time.

"So you understand finally, good", Cordelia said with a smile. "There are some more things you need to see so that you can stop being Mr. Bearded Broody fellow. Seriously, you will give Angel a run for his money."

In spite of the situation, Oliver had to chuckle at her nickname for him. The two held his hands again and then Oliver was looking at himself once more, in a raft with his dad and Dave, and he knew what was going to happen.

"There's not enough for all of us", Robert told Oliver.

"Save your strength", Oliver said drowsily.

"You can survive this", Robert said. "Make it home, make it better, right my wrongs, but you got to live through this first. You hear me, Ollie? You hear me, son?"

"Just rest, dad", Oliver said. Robert sighed, then kissed his head, before gently having him sit up straight.

Then taking out his gun, he shot Dave, killing him as he fell into the water, the gunshot jolting Oliver awake.

Tara had to look away at that bit, since she really couldn't handle seeing a gun now after what had happened to her.

"Dad?!" Oliver asked.

"Survive", Robert said, turning the gun on himself.

"No!"

BANG!

The present Oliver looked away at the scene once more. "Why are you showing me this?"

"Your father gave up his life so you could live", Cordelia said. "And right his wrongs. Which you didn't."

"The List was a murder list", Oliver said to her.

"This is why I said you bought into everyone's exaggerations of yourself", Cordelia told Oliver. "It was never a murder list. It was a list of people who corrupted the city, and made profits off of the poor people's misery. Tell me, how many of them did you actually kill?"

Oliver tried to speak, but then realized there weren't too many he had actually killed. The number was very low.

"You killed only 26 people in your first year, and most of them were in self-defense", Tara said. "You either financially ruined your targets or made sure evidence of their crimes reached the police. So no, you were never an out of control serial killer."

"And now you are thinking about Dave Hackett", Cordelia said. "He was hired by Malcolm."

"What?" Oliver asked as he turned to her in surprise.

"Isn't it convenient? He was your dad's bodyguard, his job would also involve looking around at the boat before it left, and he somehow missed the bomb", Cordelia told Oliver as his eyes widened in realization. "He had already made an escape plan. Then you and your dad survived. See the knife in his hand? He was going to kill the two of you, take the supplies, and escape. Your dad figured it out, and that's why he killed him."

"So he wasn't a good guy then", Oliver said.

"There are no fully good or bad guys. Plus, even if he didn't work for Malcolm, your father made the choice to save you, his son, whom he loved", Cordelia told Oliver. "The choice was morally questionable yes, but he did what any father would have in his place."

"You must be wondering how a man who loved his children this much could abandon Emiko", Tara said as Oliver turned to face her. "What Emiko said was a lie she had been fed by her mother."

"So my dad didn't abandon her?" Oliver asked.

"He didn't want to", Tara said. "But her mom was a spiteful person and threatened to ruin his reputation if he tried to involve himself in her life. Your father was a flawed man who made many mistakes, but was a good person at heart, not a bad person with only a few good deeds under his belt, which is what others want you to believe."

"Emiko's mother lied then", Oliver said. "And that made her hate us all. All this time, I thought my dad wasn't who I thought he was."

"He wasn't, but his heart was in the right place", Cordelia said. "Plus, in spite of his questionable actions, he was much better than that jackass version of him on Earth-2."

"What is he like on Earth-2?" Oliver asked.

"He was faced with the same choice as your dad, and he killed you to give himself a chance", Cordelia said, and Oliver would have thrown up on hearing that if he could.

He had seen a lot of horrible things, but the thought of his own father killing him was something else.

"When he took Adrian under his wing, Adrian found out, and he was disgusted, so he exposed Earth-2 Robert, who was then arrested and put away for life", Cordelia told Oliver.

"Good riddance to him", Oliver said, his love and respect for both his parents returning. They were both flawed people who did a lot of bad things, but they did love him and Thea, and they wanted to be good. They were worth honoring.

"Thank you for showing me", Oliver said.

"Don't thank us yet", Tara said. "There is more."

They held his hands and disappeared again in a flash of light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story won't have too many chapters. Pretty much less than 5.
> 
> The theory about Dave Hackett being Malcolm's paid lackey I got from another story but it wouldn't surprise me. Robert's choice, while morally unethical, was done out of love for his son, which is understandable. Love can make us do amazing things as well as horrible things.
> 
> As for the Emiko thing, honestly, the writers ruined the Queens in Season 7 with the reveal that Robert abandoned her. In the first 5 Seasons, the Queen parents came off as heavily flawed people who made too many mistakes, but their heart was in the right place, and they wanted to be good, and they loved their children.
> 
> But with this reveal, they come off as horrible people who happened to have done a few good things, and are clearly not worth honoring.
> 
> The writers' hatred for the Queen family is disturbing.
> 
> Anyway, hope everyone enjoyed and see you all next time with another chapter. Stay safe from the coronavirus ya all!


	2. Guilt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cordelia and Tara explain Oliver's guilt regarding his worst failures to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Buffyverse, Arrowverse or anything else you may recognize
> 
> Thank you to everyone for the kudos, hits and comments.

This time, Oliver, Cordelia and Tara found themselves at Lian Yu, and Oliver saw one more horrifying moment of his life play out in front of him.

He saw the past version of him on his knees on the ground, with Sara and Shado, as Ivo stood over the two women with a gun in his hand, and some of his own men flanked him.

Oliver knew what was coming next.

"You don't have to do this!" Oliver yelled at Ivo. "You got what you came for! Just take it and go!"

"10 seconds", Ivo snarled.

"You freaking psychopath!" Oliver screamed.

"History will make that judgment", Ivo said before resuming his timer. "Five seconds."

When Oliver didn't make a move, Ivo said. "Time's up."

And then he turned the gun on Sara as Oliver jumped in front of her. "No, no!"

"I guess you made your choice", Ivo said as he cocked his gun at Shado, who closed her eyes, accepting her fate.

And then there was that fateful gunshot.

"NOOOOOO!" Oliver screamed in grief as Shado's corpse fell down, while the current Oliver glared at Ivo angrily.

"Shado... Shado!"

Slade Wilson, freshly injected with the Mirakuru, came running in, and grabbed a man from, behind, tossing him into a tree as he screamed. "Ahhh!" The impact killed him.

He then smacked the other man on the face with his gun before kicking him away by many feet, and snapped the gun in two with his bare hands.

"You think he's Slayer level?" Cordelia asked Tara randomly.

"More like Vampire level", Tara said.

"Makes sense", Cordelia shrugged.

Ivo ran off as Slade grabbed the last soldier and punched his chest hard, making a hole as he pulled his bloodied fist out, the soldier falling down, dead.

Slade then looked down at Shado's corpse and fell to his knees in despair. "No!"

He lifted her up, cradling her corpse, their faces touching, as Slade's face was now coated with Shado's blood. Looking at Oliver, he asked. "Why?"

Oliver started. "I..."

"Ivo just shot her", Sara interrupted shakily. "He didn't say why."

Slade rose up, holding Shado's body in his arms as he looked to the distance vengefully. "Whoever did this to her... is going to suffer."

"And now here comes some more truth bombs and advise", Cordelia said, turning to Oliver. "Shado's death was not your fault."

"How can you say that?" Oliver asked her. "You just saw what happened! I am just as responsible as Ivo is."

Cordelia almost resisted the urge to roll her eyes at Oliver's broodiness. And here she thought Angel was bad.

"Just because he made you choose doesn't mean you were the one responsible", Tara told Oliver kindly. "If he had aimed the gun at Shado, you would have leapt in the way to protect her instead. It was a snap decision, not one made in the right state of mind."

"Still", Oliver shook his head. "Shado died because of me."

"Except, she didn't", Cordelia said, making Oliver look up at her. "Ivo never planned on killing Sara."

"What?" Oliver asked, clearly in surprise.

"When Ivo took Sara, she developed Stockholm Syndrome, since he saved her from being raped by the other crew members of the ship", Cordelia told him. "So, you can say he had a hold over her."

"People who profess to care about you and save you from even worse monsters than them have that effect on you", Tara told Oliver, thinking of her own family as she said that. "And Ivo was that person for Sara. By saving her from being raped, he made her think he was her friend who cared about her, and Sara, in her vulnerable state, managed to be fooled at the time."

"The bastard Ivo always planned to kill Shado when he dragged the three of you here", Cordelia told him. "The choice was a sham, so he could make you feel guilty about her death, and pin all of the blame on you when the time came to tell Slade."

"I guess I should have told him earlier", Oliver sighed.

"And what difference would that have made?" Cordelia asked. "You think telling him the truth about how Shado died would have cured him of his Mirakuru? Because news flash, it wouldn't have. Not one bit."

"When Slade was injected with the Mirakuru, the man who was your brother slowly started dying, Ivo telling him the truth about Shado's death was just the final wound your brother endured before he died completely", Tara said. "And he was reborn when Slade was cured of the Mirakuru years later."

"I mean, Slade didn't burn the Mirakuru one day before you attacked Ivo's ship, he just tricked you and Sara into thinking he had", Cordelia reminded Oliver. "So he had slipped very far already before Ivo told him a twisted version of the truth to drive a wedge between the two of you."

"So you are saying that Shado dying and Slade becoming my enemy was not my fault at all then", Oliver said to the two of them.

"That's exactly what I am saying", Cordelia said to Oliver. "Ivo murdered Shado while tricking you into taking the blame, and Slade was long gone before he found out how Shado truly died."

"So do not blame yourself, it never ends well, especially when it is not even your fault to begin with in the first place", Tara said. "Just let it go. Shado would never have blamed you, and now that Slade is back, he doesn't either."

And she was right, Oliver thought to himself. When Joe Wilson had taunted Slade, telling him how Oliver had done horrible things to him for which Slade had forgiven him, Slade had responded with. "BECAUSE HE FORGAVE ME FOR FAR WORSE!"

So Slade did not blame Oliver for what had happened either, now that he was in his normal state again. And it wasn't his fault.

"Well, we have one more guilt trip to go through", Cordelia said. "This one is gonna be tricky."

She and Tara held each hand of his again and they disappeared from the area, before finding themselves in the collapsing CNRI building.

Oliver then saw his past version jump in, frantically removing the debris as he assured Tommy. "You're going to be fine."

"Another thing... We got to disagree on", Tommy groaned as Oliver removed debris to see a piece of rebar sticking out of his chest.

"Tommy..." Oliver trailed off in horror.

Is-is Laurel safe? Is Laurel safe?" Tommy asked him. "I tried to get her out of here."

"Yeah, yeah, you did", Oliver nodded as he gave an assuring smile. "You saved her."

Trying to help, Oliver said. "I'm going to get you out of here. You're going to be fine."

"Stop", Tommy rasped out as Oliver stopped. "I'm sorry."

"No", Oliver shook his head. "Don't apologize."

"I was angry. And I was jealous", Tommy said in shame. "I- I am my father."

"No. No, you're not", Oliver assured him.

"Did-did you kill him?" Tommy asked.

After a second of thought, Oliver decided to lie as he shook his head. "No."

"Thank you", Tommy said with a smile before his eyes closed, and he passed on.

"No, no!" Oliver said in grief and denial. "Tommy!"

His eyes getting tearful, Oliver cried. "It should have been me."

Looking at his dead best friend Oliver begged frantically. "Open your eyes, Tommy! Open your eyes!"

The current Oliver looked down on seeing that, sighing sadly.

"It was in this moment you began to blame yourself", Cordelia said. "This is the biggest regret of your whole life. The failure you never moved past."

"I failed to stop the Undertaking, and Tommy died", Oliver said. "It is my fault."

"Some of it is, but the blame lies on Malcolm", Tara told him. "He blamed everyone here in the Glades for his wife's death, and became an even worse person than those who left his wife to die. He killed his son."

"And the things Tommy said before his death, he is not his father, but he was angry and jealous when he called you a serial killer", Cordelia said. "Because you are not, never were."

"But that hallucination of Tommy I saw a few months ago, it told me to end the cycle of violence!" Oliver shook his head.

"That was your guilt talking, the real Tommy won't do that now", Cordelia said.

"How do you know?" Oliver asked.

"Before I came to you, I spoke with him", Tara revealed as Oliver turned to her.

"How is he? Is he okay?" Oliver asked frantically.

"He is just fine, and he doesn't blame you, he blames Malcolm, who burns in Hell for his sins currently", Tara said, and Oliver wasn't surprised. Even if he had saved Thea, which seemed out of character for him really, he had done many horrible things for which he deserved punishment.

"He told me he releases you from the promise you made on his grave", Tara revealed, surprising Oliver. "He has no issues with you killing, because he sees why you did it."

"So he doesn't believe I am a serial killer anymore?" Oliver asked.

"Nope, because you never were, unlike what even you think nowadays, seriously, you should stop taking crap from people", Cordelia said, tapping his forehead with a chuckle.

"She doesn't", Tara said from behind him.

"You felt guilt for his death, and Diggle and Felicity used that to convince you to stop murdering people, to push their own black and white agenda on you", Cordelia revealed to Oliver. "Because they could never handle the fact that you killed people sometimes. They can never make the hard calls, it's not in their nature, and so they judge those who do that, like you and Lyla."

"So I guess I should have not stopped going after those on the List", Oliver said.

"No, you shouldn't have, because those people profited off of the suffering of the Glades", Tara said.

"And you just fought the symptoms, you stopped fighting the disease", Cordelia told him bluntly, and Oliver sighed sadly, realizing his mistake. "People suffered for it. And stop listening to people like Diggle and Felicity."

"You think they're not a good influence?" Oliver asked.

"In the beginning they were, but not anymore", Cordelia said. "Plus, Felicity tried to push her 'no killing morality' on you right from Day 1, because bad guys have families too. Guess we should have left Hitler alone in that case, right?"

As Oliver considered, she added. "And they criticize everything you do, and that makes you think you're an unreasonable dick to them. Guess what? You're not. You just try to make the best out of bad situations, like when you were part of the League. If Diggle couldn't understand why you had to abduct Lyla, it's a wonder how he even got into Special Forces."

"It wasn't ideal what you did, but any other assassin would have killed Lyla and taken JJ hostage", Tara said. "So while Diggle's anger is understandable to some extent, blaming you after months is not."

"And seriously, I have seen a broody guy being a dick under the pretext of trying to protect us all from his darkness, and what you did is nothing in comparison to what he did", Cordelia said, remembering Angel's dark phase. She really didn't have fond memories about that time. "So really, your methods, while extreme, weren't wrong. Your team was. The only ones who truly understand you are Sara, Roy, Slade, Nyssa, Anatoly, Barry, and now recently, Thea."

Oliver nodded, knowing she was right. He then turned to Tara. "Thank you for telling me about Tommy."

Tara nodded with a smile, as Oliver felt relieved on hearing about Tommy. Plus, they were right, Diggle and Felicity had used his state of mind to convince him to stop killing or going after those on the List, and innocents had suffered for years over it. No more, he thought to himself.

He looked up and asked. "Is this it? Or is there more?"

"Quite some more", Cordelia said. "When we're done, we'll tell you, then you can thank us."

"All right then", Oliver said as they held his hands once more and the three were gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't think I need to explain much about this chapter. Like I said, it's kind of obvious Ivo planned to kill Shado, not Sara, and doing it this way made Oliver feel guilt for it. Plus, telling Slade the truth would not have cured him of the Mirakuru, would it? And Slade was losing himself before the truth came out, so he was gone by then.
> 
> As for Tommy, he called Oliver a murderer out of anger, and then his death got to Oliver, so he swore off killing, which is again proof he is not a killer, since if he was, Tommy's death would enrage him into killing even more. And then Dig and Felicity convinced him to stop going after scumbags on the List, which was a pretty bad move. Their black and white morality harmed Oliver's crusade, so really, they were not needed as much as the show tells us they were.
> 
> Hope everyone enjoyed and see you all next time with another chapter. Stay safe from the coronavirus ya all!


	3. Relationships

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cordelia and Tara show Oliver the two worst breakups of his life, and then counsel him about his love life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Buffyverse, Arrowverse or anything else you may recognize
> 
> Thank you to everyone for the kudos, hits and comments. 
> 
> In this chapter, I shall go over the two dumbest breakups of Arrow.

Now Oliver found himself in his former lair alongside Cordelia and Tara, and looked at the past version of himself, putting on a formal suit, with Sara standing nearby, and Felicity working in the background, and Roy lay on the bed, knocked out, and Oliver realized what he was going to see.

"I would have killed him", Sara said guiltily. "I was ready to. He'd be dead right now if you wouldn't have stopped me."

"But he's not", Oliver reminded her as he turned to her. "That's all that matters."

He started limping away as she said. "That's not true. I wanted to kill Roy."

Oliver turned to face her as she said. "Because that's what I do. That's who I am."

She walked to Oliver and told him. "I spent six years in the darkness. And I looked into the eyes of the devil and I gave him my soul."

"Let me help you get it back", Oliver offered as he walked to her.

"No, you deserve someone better", Sara said, believing herself to be unworthy of Oliver. "Someone who can harness that light that's still inside of you."

She then shook her head. "But I'm not that person. And I never will be."

Sara turned away as Oliver begged. "Sara... Don't."

Sara turned back to him regretfully. "I'm sorry."

She started walking off, then stopped and looked at him. "I just care about you too much to be with you."

And with that, she walked off, leaving Oliver alone.

"Seriously, the 'it's not you it's me' cliché?" Cordelia groaned. "And you didn't even try to fight for her."

"She didn't want this", Oliver told her.

"She convinced herself she didn't, because of the darkness within her", Cordelia said. "But she made a mistake in thinking that you needed to be with someone who could harness the light inside of you."

"So, I am not supposed to be with someone who can harness my inner light?" Oliver asked.

"For a long time, you clearly thought that person was Felicity", Tara said. "The one who could harness your light. Your own light in the darkness, who would make you a good man and a hero, but the truth is- she is a very judgmental person, and she wants to change you into the man she wants you to be. Diggle is the same."

"Felicity does care about you, but she doesn't love who you are, she loves the idea of you she has built inside of her head, a fantasy in which you are her knight in shining armor", Cordelia told him. "She never approved of your darker methods, because for her as well as Diggle, everything is black and white, grey does not exist for either of them, which shows that they were never really fit for this kind of life that you live."

"We said it before, but you and Sara truly loved each other, and understood each other on a level no one else could, not even you and Laurel", Tara told him gently. "Felicity, Diggle, and even Laurel judged you whenever you did something that did not fit their definition of a hero. For them, a hero is one who simply fights and takes down some bad people, gives inspiring speeches, and doesn't kill anyone at all, even if it can save a life, and then walks away and returns home, feeling good about how he took the high road."

"And seriously, if you were paying attention, you would realize Sara made this decision in the heat of the moment", Cordelia said. "Like, remember the time she took Tibetan Pit Viper venom? She would have died rather than return to the League. But just because she faltered this one time, she suddenly thought that she is nothing more than an assassin who is only good for killing people. And Felicity's constant harps on her or the relationship you two had didn't help much either."

"What harps? What do you mean?" Oliver asked, clearly clueless about those.

"She couldn't be more obvious. She clearly showed that she was jealous of you two together, like some high school girl", Cordelia rolled her eyes. "Like the time you, Sara and Diggle were comparing scars, and she popped up about some scar in her mouth. And then trying to take down that William Tockman guy, the Watch King-"

"Clock King", Tara corrected.

"Right, Clock King, by herself, becoming a liability in the field", Cordelia said. "And you found it weird that she always showed up whenever Sara left?"

Oliver thought about it, and as much as he wanted to deny it, he couldn't. Felicity had behaved like a jealous high school girl with a crush when he and Sara had been together, and had been pretty rude to her, but he had let it slide. And she did seem to show up whenever Sara was gone. She had clearly made her intentions not subtle, and he hadn't even figured it out. As smart as he was, he clearly lacked insight when it came to what was going inside the head of any young woman interested in him. Looks like he needed to brush up his skills regarding those at least.

"And John Diggle has an unhealthy obsession about wanting the two of you to remain together", Tara told him.

"You think so?" Oliver asked.

"Remember that time he accidentally hit Sara with the escrima stick during training? He actually did it on purpose because he was pissed that she was with you rather than Felicity", Cordelia said and Oliver was actually shocked at that.

"Is that true?" He asked.

"It is", Cordelia nodded. "In his head, you and Felicity belong together, no one else has any place beside you, not Sara, not Laurel, no one else. And whenever she tore you down, he took her side over yours, even when it was clear she was in the wrong."

"Sara believed she couldn't be anything other than an assassin, and so she left, and because you didn't help her, she continued to believe it", Tara told him. "And by the time she was back, you were too lost in your relationship with Felicity to try to help her, and so she left again, and now, she is just a shadow of her former self."

Oliver wanted to argue about this, but he couldn't. No words came to his mouth. He and Sara had been through a crucible and came back stronger, with darkness inside them. They understood each other in a way no one else could, and they never judged each other for morally grey decisions they had to make. And they loved each other. And still, he hadn't fought for her, and let her break up with him in the stupidest way possible because of one setback she had experienced. And he hadn't tried to help her even after her return, and now, she truly was a shadow of her former self. All she did was sleep with random men and women in any timeline, endangering the woman, since many of them came from time periods where you could get killed for homosexuality, and now, she considered her relationship with a clone of all people to be the realest thing she had. Like, he and Nyssa didn't even matter.

Her current downfall though, was completely of her own making. Even before the island, Oliver could keep it in his pants better than Sara was currently. But a small part of the blame was on him too. If he had tried to help her after her resurrection, she would never have left.

"So you understand why the woman who loved for who you are, and the woman you loved for who she is, has fallen this hard", Tara told him. "Good. Because regarding relationships, there are some more things you need to see."

"Show me", Oliver said as both held his hands and now he found himself in Thea's loft, just having finished recording the message for his son. Felicity then came in on her wheelchair.

"How much of that did you hear?" Oliver asked her.

"Enough", Felicity said as he sighed. "Oliver, we need to talk."

"About a number of things, I suspect", he said.

"Let's start with..." Felicity lifted her hand and took off her engagement ring, putting it on the table. "I can't do this."

As he looked at her, clearly hurt, she said. "When your son was in danger, I had to table what I was feeling about everything, but now that I've had some space, I realize I need space."

"Felicity", Oliver started.

"I know the position Samantha put you in, I know it was an impossible decision, but you were right", Felicity said to him. "You should have told me. Marriage is about inclusion. It's about leaning on your partner when things get complicated. I don't think that you know how to do that."

"I'm-I'm trying", Oliver defended himself.

"And now you're sending William away, and I understand why", Felicity said. "You know that I do, but once again, you have left me out of the decision."

Then suddenly Felicity's legs moved a little, to both of their shocks, and Felicity stood up as Oliver said in amazement. "Felicity?"

The two looked at her legs and said simultaneously. "Oh, my God."

Then Felicity looked at Oliver tearfully, and slowly staggered out of the room.

"Oh my God! She even regained her legs to walk out on you! How much more soap-opery and melodramatic can this scene get? I swear even 'Passions' wasn't this over the top", Cordelia rolled her eyes, and now viewing the scene as a third party, even Oliver himself couldn't disagree with her. It did kind of look ridiculous, as if it was from a badly written soap opera.

"She said she had to table what she felt, but she didn't actually table it. Remember her comment of "Let's hope he doesn't inherit too much from his father?"", Tara reminded, and Oliver remembered, now realizing how insensitive that was of her too.

"Also, you two weren't married at this point, right? I mean, it's hard to keep track", Cordelia said.

"We weren't", Oliver shook his head.

"In that case, why does she think she should be consulted over what happens to William?" Cordelia asked Oliver. "What happens to William is up to you and Samantha, his parents. Not Felicity."

"It was pretty out of line for her to say that, even if her feelings over you keeping a secret are understandable", Tara said.

"Also, you can't keep a secret, but she can, right?" Cordelia asked as Oliver turned to her. "She helped Team Arrow behind your back for quite some time, and before that, she kept Ray's suit a secret from you all, the same suit he used to hunt you down later, and don't forget Helix, a cyber-terrorist organization. She was part of them, and her actions actually lead to an agent being killed, and a criminal hacker worse than her and daddy dearest combined to escape."

"She may love you, but she doesn't respect you. She drugged you to sneak you out of Nanda Parbat when you had agreed to stay and be Ra's heir", Tara reminded him.

"Like, how stupid is she? Did she really think Ra's wouldn't retaliate?" Cordelia asked, and Oliver had to concede her point. Honestly, it was a miracle her, Diggle and Malcolm were still alive after that stunt. And Malcolm also helping out was so stupid of him, he was smarter than that. Did Felicity have some weird effect on all bad guys that turned them stupid and made them admire her? Because Ra's had admired her for some reason.

"She told you once that she had your back every time, but she didn't, she always tore you down whenever you did something she didn't like in the most immature way possible", Tara said. "And Diggle took her side every time that happened, and during your 4th year, even Laurel and Thea walked all over you."

"You thought she was your light, but really, she emasculated you", Cordelia said bluntly.

"You really aren't too much with subtlety are you?" Oliver asked.

"I think it, I say it", Cordelia shrugged. "I mean, for a time, I decided not to do it since it could be insensitive, but now, at this stage, I think that's the only way to get people to listen."

"When you got with her, you let her and everyone else walk over you, and judge you, and your fighting skills deteriorated too because you cared more about spending time with her than staying in top form to fight the people who went against you", Tara said and once more, Oliver had to concede.

In his 4th year, a kid like Machin had been able to give him a fight, and even cops had been able to beat him up, and sneak up on him.

"And seriously, Diaz? He is just a thug whose skills are a little above the rest, but after Malcolm, Slade, Ra's, Damien and Adrian, he should be nothing to you", Cordelia said. "And did you get braindead when he came after you? You could have easily called the President to get that bitch Watson off of you, and really, Diaz wasn't all that. You could have taken him down easily."

Oliver was deep in thought from both of their words, as Tara said. "You realize your mistakes in relationships now. And you are wondering how Felicity would have reacted if you had told her."

"What do you think?" Oliver asked.

"Remember that timeline Barry erased during your battle with Savage? Let's take a look", Cordelia said, and the two transported him to that timeline, in front of the farmhouse at night.

"In this timeline, you've only known for about a few hours rather than few months", Cordelia said.

"Everyone's waiting for you", Felicity told Oliver as he arrived.

"Sorry, just something I had to take care of", Oliver said.

"So I guess you're off the secret-keeping wagon", Felicity said as he walked past her.

"That's not it", Oliver told her.

"Then what is it?" She asked as he sighed.

"I think Damian Darhk has someone operating in Central City. So I sent Barry to run down a lead", Oliver told her.

"This kind of lead?" Felicity asked as she revealed the paternity test, to his shock. "He didn't know what he was giving me. But I run enough tests on your blood to recognize your DNA sequence anywhere."

"Felicity, you don't..."

"You had to run a paternity test, didn't you?" She asked.

Oliver looked away. "Look, Felicity..."

"Stop", she snapped. "I cannot hear another lie."

"It's more complicated than that", Oliver said with folded arms.

"God, Oliver, you are the only person on this planet who considers the truth complicated", Felicity said as she walked to his front. "Just to be clear, I don't care that you have a child. I can't believe that you have a child that you didn't tell me about. I care that you lied to me just now."

"You know that my whole world just exploded? And I think that I'm entitled to a... A minute to process that by myself", Oliver said.

"You somehow managed to go to CCPD and track down Barry. You didn't keep it to yourself; you kept it from me", Felicity accused. "When were you planning on telling me?"

"I don't know", he shook his head.

"If you loved me, if you trusted me, telling me this wouldn't be such a burden- it would be a relief", Felicity said. "But you don't trust me. You never will. And how can I be with someone who doesn't trust me?"

"Felicity..." Oliver said but she walked off.

Oliver was shocked this time. "You said I have known only for a few hours here, right?"

"Yes, just a few hours", Tara said.

"How can she react like that? She is behaving as if I have kept this for years!" Oliver snapped, this time rightfully angry at this version of Felicity.

"Also, you didn't actually tell Barry anything, you just made him run a test without telling him the details, so yes, you did keep it to yourself", Cordelia said. "Unlike what the blonde in glasses thinks."

"And earlier, you had told Felicity you would tell her when you figured it all out, but she still snooped around and made Barry give up the test", Tara said. "So she has no respect for you. She claims you don't trust her, but it is she who doesn't trust you. And she never will."

"My God!" Oliver said, rubbing his hand over his head, now realizing how bad his relationship with Felicity truly was. She was too immature, and he had let her walk over him. Sure she had gotten better in the recent two years, but after all that had happened, it seemed a bit too late.

"I've seen my fair share of toxic relationships in my time, but none of them were as bad as yours with Felicity, other than Barry and Iris on your Earth, they are like the two of you dialed to an 11", Cordelia said before commenting to Tara. "Why he stays with her when she said to his face that she didn't care their daughter worked with the man who murdered his mother is beyond me."

"Me too, when a relationship gets toxic, any sensible person would end it", Tara agreed with her.

"I can't believe how much I screwed up in my love life", Oliver told the two of them. "You two have shown me my mistakes now."

"Yeah, but romance isn't just it", Cordelia said. "There are a few more things for you to see."

"Show me", Oliver said.

"Sure", Tara said as they held his hands again and disappeared with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has 2 more chapters to go.
> 
> As for Diggle hitting Sara on purpose during that training session, here's why I did that- Few years ago, I was reading some comments under the video of that training clip from 2x14, and I saw Olicity fanatics commenting that they're gonna pretend Dig ships Olicity and so he hit Sara on purpose. And there weren't just 2 or 3 comments like that, there were over 10 comments which said something like that.
> 
> So I decided that I should make it true here, so we can all see how immature and obsessed with Olicity Diggle is. And honestly, with his Olicity obsession, wouldn't surprise me.
> 
> Next chapter is going to be the most important here.
> 
> Anyway, hope everyone enjoyed and see you all next time with another chapter. Stay safe from the coronavirus ya all!


	4. Not a monster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cordelia and Tara show Oliver that he is not a monster at all, unlike what others say.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Buffyverse, Arrowverse or anything else you may recognize
> 
> Thank you to everyone for the kudos, hits and comments. 
> 
> And this will be the last chapter regarding Oliver's self-reflection, next one will be an epilogue really.

Oliver now found himself in his current lair, alongside Cordelia and Tara, and he could see Rene reading names on the List, realizing what he was going to see this time.

"Let me get this straight. You got a "To Kill" list, and I'm the out-of-control one?" Rene asked Oliver.

"I haven't used that list, I haven't looked at it in 4 years", Oliver told him.

"Wait. 4 years?" Curtis asked. "I thought there was some other guy in the hood."

"No. That was Oliver. The Hood, the Arrow, Green Arrow- all him", Felicity revealed to them all.

"That notebook belonged to my father, and when I was first starting out, I thought that it was my way to save the city", Oliver told them.

"Well, I think we now know the message Prometheus is trying to send", Rory spoke up.

"You do?" Felicity asked. "Because I don't. Do you guys?"

"He's saying you're the serial killer", Rory accused Oliver.

"Harsh, but feeling pretty accurate", Evelyn agreed with him.

"I was trying to help this city. Prometheus isn't", Oliver defended himself.

"You convinced me to not get revenge on Ruvé Darhk for my parents because killing would tarnish the Black Canary's legacy. How are you anything other than a hypocrite?" Evelyn snarled at him.

"First, it would have tarnished her legacy", Oliver explained. "Second, you knew that I was a killer when you came on board."

"Not a serial killer", Evelyn fired back. "I know some of these names. You've got bankers in here, lawyers, a city councilman."

"This kid should be slapped by Harmony", Cordelia commented on Evelyn, remembering the time Harmony had slapped the shit out of Eve, and now chucking at the mental image of her slapping Evelyn.

"Evelyn hated you because you killed. Her solution? Join an even worse person, who killed only innocent people, while you targeted the worst ones", Tara told Oliver. "So if she went off the deep end, it is because she had an irrational hatred of you, not because you happened to be a killer of any kind."

"And for that, she really didn't deserve to be part of your team", Cordelia told Oliver.

"Yes, her reasoning for being part of Prometheus' team never made any sense at all", Oliver agreed with them on that.

"Also, Rene or Rory didn't really hear you out, just condemned you as a serial killer because of the List, even though it was your way to clean the city of scum, and actually save it", Tara said to Oliver. "They may think you're a monster and killer, but you're not."

"And if you don't believe it, we shall show you some more", Cordelia said as they held his hands and now, they found themselves in Adrian's lair, where Oliver was shirtless and on his knees, Adrian walking around and taunting him.

"Confess Oliver, you don't kill because you have to, so why, why do you do it?" Adrian asked him.

"Because I wanted to", Oliver muttered to himself.

"What?" Adrian asked with a malevolent glee in his eyes.

"I wanted to", Oliver muttered, falling to his knees before getting up and yelling at the top of his lungs. "I WANTED TO! AND I LIKED IT!"

The glee in Adrian's eyes was enough to tell everyone that he was happy at finally achieving his objective.

"You really think that's true?" Cordelia asked Oliver. "That you are a monster who wanted to kill people, and you liked it?"

"I did like that I was ridding my city of scum, but the act of killing itself wasn't something that pleased me", Oliver told her truthfully, now realizing it at last.

"You were never a remorseless serial killer, but because Felicity, Diggle, and now Rene, Rory, Curtis and Evelyn kept criticizing the methods you employed during your first year, you came to believe it over time", Tara said. "And that made Adrian's work that much easier regarding you."

"Trust me, Oliver, I have seen the worst of the worst", Cordelia said, thinking about Angelus, and shuddering at the fact that he was the evil alter ego of the man she loved. "They love murder, and consider it an art, even get off on it. You are not one bit like them at all."

"If you were any kind of killer, would a friend's death make you stop killing?" Tara pointed out, and Oliver couldn't disagree with her.

"So their constant harping on me is what made me buy that I am a monster, and that Adrian was right about me", Oliver sighed sadly. "And I truly am not."

"Now there is one more thing you must see", Tara said and they held his hands, with Oliver finding himself in the lair again, arguing with Diggle.

"If this isn't 100% for our city, then you are not the hero that it deserves, and you never will be", Dig snarled at Oliver.

"Ricardo Diaz has God knows how much of our city in his grip, and you're picking now to lecture me or to whine about not getting a promotion?" Oliver asked, exasperated.

"Promotion?" Dig asked angrily, feeling bad that Oliver was, in his mind, thinking so low of him. "This isn't about a promotion, man. This is about you. And Diaz? You still can't see it."

"See what?" Oliver asked, more annoyed than anything.

"He's already won, Oliver", Dig said. "He has the city wired, and it happened under your watch."

"He showed up while you were the Green Arrow!" Oliver reminded, not letting him get off easy. "You brought drugs from him, John! You funded what he is doing right now! The entire time I put you in that hood, and you hid having a drug problem!"

"And I was putting my body through hell for the sake of our city", Dig said, trying to sound like he had done something heroic, when it was just cowardly what he had done.

"No", Oliver reprimanded. "You put the team at risk by lying! I had to dive off a bridge to save Rene's life because you were in the field, you weren't 100%, and nobody knew it!"

"You really want to bring up Rene right now when he is still hospitalized for the beating that you put on him?" Dig asked and Oliver had to resist the urge to roll his eyes.

"We were in the field against Dinah, Curtis, and Rene. He pulls a gun on me! You think he gave me a choice?" Oliver asked, rightfully defending himself.

"I think that you leave a trail of bodies every damn place that you go! Sure you've changed, but what comforts that to William, whose mother's dead because of bad decisions that you've made?" Dig sneered, and in that moment, he crossed a huge line.

"My trail of bodies doesn't include my own brother", Oliver sneered back, deciding if Dig could cross a line, so could he.

With that, the two started fighting as Cordelia said. "He is such a big baby and hypocrite. According to him, saving a mass murderer like Vince, who dismissed innocents he killed as collateral damage, is preferable to saving a city? How did he get into the military with a mindset like that?"

"And Diggle did put the team at risk by not telling of his injuries", Tara pointed out. "Then, he took drugs from Diaz to help himself. He may not have known it was Diaz, but he knew he was taking drugs from a shady source, because perfectly legal experimental drugs aren't sold in shady back alleys."

"He is just jealous and angry that he isn't Green Arrow anymore, because wearing the suit gave him an ego bigger than even Lian Yu", Cordelia told him. "Also, he accuses you of leaving a trail of bodies wherever you go but it was his blind trust in his brother that got Laurel killed, even though you rightfully suspected him."

Oliver nodded while Cordelia continued. "And he accuses you of having a blind spot for Laurel and your family but he has so many blind spots- Felicity, Ted Gaynor, his brother, it's a wonder he can even see straight."

"Also, Rene, you gave him every chance to stand down, only he attacked you with an ax till his wounds reopened", Tara reminded him. "Dinah was obsessed with vengeance over a man like Vincent Sobel. She disgraced Sara and Laurel by wearing that mask. And Curtis used a man's disability against him. So none of them have any feet to stand on when they criticize you."

"Looks like I had the wrong team all along then", Oliver said in realization. "None of them were comfortable with the morally grey actions I committed, and judged me as a monster, making me believe the lie myself."

"Yeah, but you're not a monster", Cordelia assured him. "You're a hero."

"Is there anything else you want to show me?" Oliver asked.

"No, this is the end", Tara said. "No more points in your life for you to see, because you finally understand now."

"I do", Oliver said, looking at them both gratefully, appreciation shining in his eyes. "Thank you, for reminding me who I am, who I should be. I will never forget it."

"Good, because appreciation is always nice", Cordelia quipped, making the three chuckle.

"You are ready now", Tara said.

"Wait", Oliver said, looking at the two of them. "How did you two die?"

"What?" Cordelia asked.

"Show me, please", Oliver said, as the two women realized what he intended to do.

"Oliver, are you sure about this?" Tara asked.

"Surer than ever", Oliver shrugged.

"Okay then", Tara said as she and Cordelia held his hands, and then Oliver found himself in a garden in front of a house, and he saw a blonde woman and a dark haired man hugging.

Oliver then looked up at the window of the house and with his eyesight, he could make out Tara's backside, she was even wearing the same clothes she was currently, and she was talking to a red haired woman wearing a white blouse.

Then Oliver turned to see a man with a gun arriving, as the man hugging the blonde woman saw him and yelled. "Buffy!"

The blonde woman- Buffy, and the man jumped to face him as he snarled crazily. "You think you can just do that to me? You think I'd let you get away with that?" He laughed crazily. "Think again."

Suddenly he raised a gun and fired wildly at them. Buffy frantically shoved the man down. He tumbled to the ground. The shooter ran off, firing wildly into the air over his shoulder as he went.

Oliver turned to look as one of the bullets shattered the window, and went into Tara's back, right into her heart, the backside of her shirt bloody, while the red haired woman's face and blouse was also splattered by Tara's blood. Tara slumped down as the woman looked on in horror and then cradled her body, sobbing bitterly.

Oliver looked at the shooter's retreating figure, rightful rage in his eyes as Tara grasped his shoulder gently. "This was it."

"I am sorry this happened to you", Oliver said, finding it unfair that a woman like her had died abruptly, that too due to an accident.

"It wasn't your fault", Tara assured him.

He then turned to Cordelia. "What about you?"

"I can't show you, it was a long story, but short version", Cordelia said. "You see I'm a higher being now. But a few years ago, I was tricked into thinking I became one, and ascended, but it was actually an evil being called Jasmine who had tricked so she could control me. The actual higher powers found out so when I returned to Earth, they gave me amnesia to lock her up, but when my memories returned, she awoke, and then, she made me sleep with the son of the man I loved so I could give birth to her."

Oliver could feel anger and disgust come over him at what Jasmine had done to Cordelia as she continued. "After giving birth, I went into a coma, but was allowed to astral project one last time to help Angel, the man I loved, and then I died."

"I'm sorry", Oliver said but she shook her head.

"Feel sorry later, be the hero now", Cordelia said. "And in case you still don't believe you're a hero, take a look."

She touched his chest and Oliver suddenly found himself in the middle of a dark room as several projections played out in front of him.

He saw himself using the move Slade taught him for the first time to take down a soldier.

Then he looked as he saw himself shooting Fyers to save Shado.

That was followed by him grabbing Sara's hand and leading her away from Ivo's men along with Slade and Shado.

Then he watched as he saw himself watching Robert's video message to him, followed by him stabbing Kovar in front of Anatoly.

That was followed by him finally ending Kovar on Lian Yu.

Then Oliver saw as he lit up the logs on flames and then took off his hood in front of the fishermen.

Then he saw himself snapping the neck of one of the men who had kidnapped him and Tommy, followed by throwing a fletchette at the device behind Adam Hunt to take away his embezzled money.

Then Oliver saw himself fighting and stabbing Blanks, followed by his fight in the hallway in Bludhaven to save Walter, and then he saw himself in a chokehold by Malcolm before he picked up an arrow and stabbed it through himself, taking Malcolm down too in the process.

That was followed by him killing the Count.

He then saw as he wore his mask for the first time.

As the projections continued, he saw himself leading the other heroes of the city against Slade's Mirakuru army in the tunnel, followed by his fight with Slade as he fired arrows that shot into ropes to restrain him.

Then he saw his talk with Barry after the speedster had woken up in which he encouraged him to be a hero.

Then he saw his desperate fight on the cliff with Ra's al Ghul, followed by him talking Malcolm down from killing Brick.

That was followed by him shooting Thawne from behind with a nanite arrow, taking down the mad speedster.

Then he saw his final fight against Ra's as he stabbed the leader through his chest.

After that, he saw himself giving the entire city a video message as the Green Arrow.

Then he was standing side to side with Barry as they took down Vandal Savage with his own staff.

That was followed by him stabbing Darhk with an arrow.

Then he saw himself knock out Tobias Church, followed by him restraining Vigilante.

And then Oliver looked at himself defeating Slade in the Dream World, followed by helping in the fight against Dominators.

And then he saw was himself as Mayor giving a speech to Star City.

That was followed by him refusing to give in to Adrian, not killing him, and then taking down his Earth-X doppelganger as well, followed by beating up Diaz after he had shot Quentin, then his speech when his identity had been revealed.

That was followed by his battle against Diaz in the prison, and then talking down Earth-2 Tommy from blowing up the Glades, and the final thing he saw was his noble sacrifice against the Parademons.

They all disappeared as in front of him now appeared Jim Corrigan and raising his hand said. "Oliver Queen, you have not failed this city."

His eyes glowed as Oliver felt heavy dark green robes drape over his body, and then a hood cover his head, as he felt power like he never had before.

"They will have…vengeance", Oliver said as his eyes glowed too. The Spectre had been born!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And this is the end of the main story, hope all enjoyed. And next chapter will be an epilogue where all 3 of these get their well-deserved happy endings.
> 
> Hope everyone enjoyed and see you all next time with the final chapter. Stay safe from the coronavirus ya all!


	5. Everything's perfect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A new Multiverse is formed after the battle against the Anti-Monitor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Buffyverse, Arrowverse or anything else you may recognize
> 
> Thank you to everyone for the kudos, hits and comments. 
> 
> And well, this is the final chapter, I would like to thank everyone who stuck with me till here. Your support is always very much appreciated.
> 
> So, on with it.

After turning into the Spectre, Oliver had approached the 9 Paragons at the Vanishing Point, as they were the only survivors left after the Anti-Monitor had destroyed the entire Multiverse.

The Paragons were- Barry Allen the Paragon of Love, Sara Lance the Paragon of Destiny, Earth-96 Clark Kent the Paragon of Hope, Earth-167 Clark Kent the Paragon of Justice, his own doppelganger from Earth-167 the Paragon of Humanity (Oliver grudgingly admitted he was a better archer and a bit more fun to hang out with, but he could kick his ass in a hand to hand fight), Earth-89 Bruce Wayne the Paragon of Courage, Buffy Summers the Paragon of Steadfastness, Angel the Paragon of Redemption and Willow Rosenberg the Paragon of Magic.

He had recognized Buffy as the blonde woman in the garden during Tara's death, and he remember Cordelia having mentioned Angel as the man she loved, while he remembered Willow as well, since she was the red haired woman who had been with Tara during her death.

Oliver had then unlocked Barry's full potential, making him drop them off through the Speed Force where they had seen different moments of his life, and then they had reached the Dawn of Time to battle the Anti-Monitor and his army.

As Oliver looked down at the Paragons battling the Parademons, Anti-Monitor walked up next to him.

"Only I am eternal", Anti-Monitor boasted to him.

Oliver took off his hood and said in challenge. "We'll see about that."

They flew into the air as Anti-Monitor fired a beam of anti-matter which Oliver avoided as they landed on the ground.

Anti-Monitor fired another beam which Oliver blocked with his power, gritting his teeth as Anti-Monitor walked closer, the two struggling against each other.

The beam struggle continued, the two gritting their teeth at each other as Oliver then heard Cordelia and Tara speaking to him.

" _Come on Oliver, you can save them. You can save all of them"_ , Tara assured him.

" _Cheap idiot in a life support suit can't do a thing to you, kick his ass"_ , Cordelia said. " _Remember all the pain he has caused, the people he has hurt."_

" _And make that your power_ ", Tara added.

"Say goodbye!" Anti-Monitor laughed hysterically.

As the beam struggle continued, a powerful blast of Heat Vision hit Anti-Monitor from behind, slightly staggering him as he turned to see the two Superman glaring at him.

"KAL-EL!" He roared in anger.

" _NOW!"_ Tara said.

" _DO IT NOW!"_ Cordelia said too.

Oliver let out a roar as his beam overpowered that of Anti-Monitor, making him stagger back as he screamed, feeling Oliver's power come over and burn him. He then looked in the front with wide eyes as Oliver walked forwards, his hand held out, firing his beam of power.

"Mobius, you have failed this Multiverse!" Oliver growled at him as a power surrounded him and shot out into the skies, while Anti-Monitor screamed on feeling himself burn up.

By now, the Paragons were using the Book of Destiny as well, channeling their power through it to help Oliver out.

Oliver knew what he had to. He had to make a new Multiverse, where he and his friends all had a better life, and he would make sure they did, though some things that helped out in their origins, he couldn't change.

Feeling the power of the Paragons flow through him as well alongside the Book of Destiny and his own, Oliver channeled his inner energy, while using the area's instability due to being the Dawn of Time, transporting himself away temporarily to somewhere else.

* * *

Insectoid Dimension, many years ago

Jasmine watched as the insectoid Demons bowed to her when an energy took form in the middle of the place and Oliver Queen appeared, glaring at her.

Jasmine gave him a look as Oliver snarled. "Jasmine, your time has come."

Jasmine tilted her head to a side with an arrogant smile, walking closer to him, hoping he would come under her allure.

Then Oliver smirked back, and her eyes widened in horror as she realized her powers had no effect on him.

She tried to strike him with her energy but he was unaffected. He had just defeated the Anti-Monitor, she was nothing in comparison.

He then grabbed her head by both sides and made her look at him, and she screamed in pain and horror as she was burnt by his powers into nothingness, and now, nothing was left of her at all.

The insectoids all fled around in terror as Oliver said. "No one has to suffer under her now."

He then disappeared from there, going back to the Dawn of Time, where he used his power to finish creating the new Multiverse, though this body couldn't survive all of it, but he had the perfect solution for that.

* * *

Earth-Prime

Oliver groaned as he opened his eyes, feeling exhausted due to what he had just gone through. He then looked next to him to see Sara awakening with a groan too.

Both were naked.

"Ollie?" She called out to him, shocked to see him still there.

"Hey Sara", Oliver smiled at her as she touched his face to assure herself he was still there.

"Ollie", Sara said happily, kissing him on the lips as he kissed her back, the two finally together once more.

* * *

Same time, Earth-92

Willow woke up, remembering the last thing she had seen was Oliver Queen creating the new Multiverse, when she felt movement next to her bed, and turned, her eyes widening on seeing it was Tara next to her.

"Oh my God!" Willow said out loud, waking Tara up.

"Willow, what's the matter?" Tara asked her, stroking her face, happy to be with her again.

"Nothing, its nothing", Willow shook her head, stroking her face back as they kissed. They both decided to enjoy this day as it was, they could mention Crisis to each other on the next day.

* * *

Angel woke up, and to his shock, it was daylight. And he was on a beach, dressed in swimwear, with sunglasses over his eyes.

"Huh?!" He muttered to himself, looking at his hands. Nope, no Ring of Amara. He then slapped himself a few times, and then checked his teeth. They were normal.

"Oh boy!" Angel said, realizing what had happened.

"Any problem, champ?" A voice asked, holding his hand.

Angel felt his heart skip a beat (it was beating!) as he followed the hand to its owner- Cordelia! She looked at him with a smile, also wearing sunglasses and swimwear.

"No", Angel said, shaking his head, shocked as well as happy to see her once more, alive and well. He then moved his face to her and kissed her, and she kissed him back, both enjoying it.

Like with Willow and Tara, they decided they would mention Crisis the next day, and just enjoy today to its fullest.

* * *

Night time

Willow and Tara were out for date night, slow dancing to a song as they hugged each other and hovered in the air.

"I love you", Tara said to Willow.

Willow smiled giddily. "I love you too."

Tara smiled giddily as well before Willow asked. "Everything all right?"

"Perfect", Tara told her. "Everything's perfect."

* * *

Same time, Earth-Prime, Central City

Oliver, Sara, Cisco, Caitlin, Slade, Roy, Thea and Nyssa watched as Barry held Thawne against the wall.

"We have been through this more times than I can count, Barry", Thawne said to him and laughed hysterically in his face. "Barry Allen is above killing."

"Not anymore, at least not when its necessary", Barry sneered in his face and Thawne's smirk vanished as Barry phased his hand through Thawne's heart, making him gasp as blood dropped out of his mouth, and he fell to the ground, dead, while Barry sighed, falling to his knees.

Oliver walked up behind him, grasping his shoulder gently. "You did it not because you liked it, but because you had to."

"I know", Barry sighed, looking up at his friend gratefully. "Thank you."

"No problem", Oliver assured. Barry would carry this with him forever, but he knew he had done the right thing. His and Patty's upcoming baby would not grow up in a world not threatened by the speedster who had taken everything from him.

Oliver walked to Sara, the two holding hands as they smiled at each other, and they walked off, back home to their daughter Mia, all of them dispersing.

A brave new Multiverse had been formed, and it had the Multiverse's finest to protect it from any kind of threats that arose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's the end of this story at last, and while short, it was an enjoyable ride I hope, I had fun writing it.
> 
> And I know you know that I put in Smallville and DBZ references *winks*
> 
> So the Shanshu prophecy came true and Angel is a human now, since the apocalypse it referred to could have been Crisis too, and so Angel and Cordelia get their happy ending, and so do Willow and Tara, as well as Oliver and Sara.
> 
> Thawne's dead too. Hope my Paragon picks were enjoyed.
> 
> And yes, Mia is now Oliver's and Sara's daughter.
> 
> I know this was low on action, but the point of this fic wasn't action at all. If you want an epic battle against the Anti-Monitor, wait for COIE in my 'Heroes' series, as I constantly push the bounds of epic in that one.
> 
> Anyway, thank you to everyone for sticking with me for these 5 chapters, and it was so much fun people, thank you very much all of you.
> 
> Until next time.
> 
> Stay safe from the coronavirus ya all!


End file.
